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Wednesday, 28 September 2016

Four Things I Wish the Mainstream Understood about Domination and Submission

Being Dominant or Submissive doesn't
mean anything.
1. Being Dominant or Submissive doesn't mean anything. I mean, it doesn't imply a political stance - you don't have to believe in authority for its own sake, or in gendered authority, e.g. you can be a straight male dom or female sub and still be a Feminist!
Nor does it imply a life plan - you can be submissive in private and high-powered in "normal life". Subs aren't all losers. Doms aren't top dogs. (Though I suspect your orientation may affect how you go about what you do.)

2. It doesn't have to take over your life.  You don't have to be in a BDSM club. You can be dominant or submissive just in the bedroom and only some of the time. Dominating your partner in bed doesn't mean you get to chose your next vacation destination. You don't have to do it 24/7.

3. If you do do 24/7 D/s, it doesn't have to be 24/7 kink.  It probably won't be 24/7 kink actually. Real life just doesn't lend itself to that, and people like range in their relationships.
Even so, you can have an asymmetric relationship that works over the long term - FLR or MLR. We already know what the male dominant version looks like; basically an old fashioned marriage.

4. If your relationship is asymmetric it still doesn't mean anything. Hell! You can sleep in  a cage every night and go to work in a chastity device, and still be a take charge person at work.

Learn how to how to walk the same Femdom path with your partner! 

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