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Monday, 28 November 2016

Towards a Submissive Thrall Manifesto

The action will be for the
dominant's benefit.
My name is Giles English and I'm a "submissive thrall".

OK. I made up that last term... or almost. Merriam Webster defines a thrall as:

1
a : a servant slave : bondman; also : serfb : a person in moral or mental servitude
2
a : a state of servitude or submission <in thrall to his emotions>b : a state of complete absorption <mountains could hold me in thrall with a subtle attraction of their own — Elyne Mitchell>
So, essentially thrall is another - more poetic - word for "slave" but with romantic overtones - e.g. "I am enthralled by my mistress" - and no specific BDSM expectations.

I propose...
a submissive thrall 
is a sexual submissive who, 
when they (consensually) submit, 
actually submits to their 
dominant for real.

A thrall, when submitting, can be anything from an affectionate subordinate lover through to a mute protocol-bound slave. The scope of a thrall's submission can range from occasional bedroom only, all the way to 24/7/365.

None of that matters.

What defines a thrall is that, when we submit, the power exchange is effectively real within permissive limits. Specifically:
  • A thrall's hard limits (a) are permissive enough to grant satisfactory freedom of action to the dominant, and (b) identify only those lines which would be dangerous to cross.
  • A thrall offers their kinks and fantasies to the dominant as optional tools to be exploited for the dominant's pleasure by way of reward and incentive. (Or as an a la carte menu for inexperienced dominants.)
  • A thrall's safeword is for mental and physical safety, only. There will be no attempt to direct the action.
It follows that a thrall accepts:
  • They may sometimes be bored, frustrated or uncomfortable.
  • The action will be primarily for the dominant's benefit, even when they give pleasure.
  • Any issues will be handled within the context of the power exchange.
  • Punishment will be real punishment.
  • Nobody will step out of role, because nobody is in role.
Nobody will step out of role,
because nobody is in role.
We need a specific term for this because "submissive" is now used very loosely to cover anybody who submits erotically in anyway to anybody doing anything.

Somebody who submits within a very tight scope - highly scripted scenes or ones with lots of affirmative consent - can identify as a submissive, as can somebody who hires pro-dominants in order to  explore their fantasies.

All these people are "real" submissives. (And their dominants are "real" dominants.)

However, this means we don't have a word for a submissive who craves a D/s relationship in which the power exchange feels real, even if it is limited in scope and time. ("Slave" won't do because it can mean a specific level of lifestyle submission and/or particular protocol and has some unfortunate associations for some cultures.)

All this makes it hard for "thralls" to identify themselves to themselves and to potential partners, and doubly hard for dominants to make clear what they are looking for.

Hence my term, submissive thrall.

And no, I have no idea what the dominant counterpart would be called.

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5 comments:

  1. I very much appreciate this post. I am in a relationship that is drifting deeper into femdom waters and this manifesto is a good description of where I think we're drifting to, I do wish I could publically post this comment but it seems we're the last consensual sexual people closeted.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much! Really, most of us are in hiding. Our orientation is none of anybody else's business. That's one reason why I blog. Can you tell us more about your relationship and how it's evolving?

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    2. Well we've been together for two great years but after the first year most of my libido disappeared. I'd always had strong submissive tendencies, and had really wanted to use a CB-6000 I'd had in a drawer for the last ten years in the relationship but my SO wasn't wild about it and everytime I masterbated I lost more interest in both.
      Fast Forward to September, my SO's doctor found a small non serious issue that required minor surgery, anyway I work part time and she was home for two week so I ended up being unable to masterbate, which restored my libido and gave her a motive to try the CB6k.
      Now I've been continuously locked for about a month and a half, and things are going great. I wake up early to make a cup of tea for her and wake her up with cuniligus every morning, do all the dishes, give her a weekly bath and massage, she's getting more comfortable directing me to get her wine, comb her hair while we watch the Good Wife, and such. Also pegging, but that's really just her doing something for me. BTW based on your reviews I've also ordered a Ghost and a Espresso x3(I live in SE Asia so shipping is almost as much as the devices. so might as well do both).

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