tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1926558375998557812.post8536148413890416190..comments2024-01-22T20:11:57.757+00:00Comments on How do I get my wife to dominate me?: A Spat Ends in Discipline: Commitment trumps Consent in a Female Led RelationshipGiles Englishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06078027627281038866noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1926558375998557812.post-82502550282626475052018-12-27T19:29:43.588+00:002018-12-27T19:29:43.588+00:00That's a good way of putting it!That's a good way of putting it!Giles Englishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06078027627281038866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1926558375998557812.post-3665670047683915962018-12-15T00:01:04.329+00:002018-12-15T00:01:04.329+00:00It strikes me that consent gets, sometimes hopeles...It strikes me that consent gets, sometimes hopelessly, muddled up with "want" or "desire" or even sometimes "feelinglikeit". Which is a fairly useful proxy for one night stands or low-real-committment relationships (early coupledom, fwb, fb, playmates, teenagers etc). But it's a nigh on useless equivalence in many other situations, from sex work or other transactional arrangements (including, arguably, some traditional marriages) to, as you say, any committed relationship. <br /><br />Consent means to "agree to" NOT "to want".<br /><br />Interestingly, outside sexual context,the word consent is often used to express the opposite of want or desire, ie an acquiescence to something less than desirable. Rape or assault is defined (as of now) as lacking consent. Not as lacking enjoyment or desire. And thanks fuck.<br /><br />All of this to say that from where I'm standing the situation you describe is not "committment trumping consent" but "committment leading to consent". <br /><br />And what you might eroticise as entrapment and the ConPol might feel icky about is that you're consenting to something that you don't necessarily in-itself, immediately, want or desire.<br /><br />ALL THAT WE'VE MADEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07619019853037126332noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1926558375998557812.post-80351268908148702442018-12-03T16:42:11.293+00:002018-12-03T16:42:11.293+00:00Exactly! We actually like the trapped part.Exactly! We actually like the trapped part.Giles Englishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06078027627281038866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1926558375998557812.post-34394619703356572312018-12-03T15:48:47.136+00:002018-12-03T15:48:47.136+00:00My wife occasionally reminds me that I asked for t...My wife occasionally reminds me that I asked for this relationship and that I should be careful what I wish for.<br />It is a slippery slope with little possibility to return from.<br />I am also trapped and I like it!MrBillSailshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09692496219634997515noreply@blogger.com