Punishment - don't create a moral hazard!

"I like to wait until at least 60
before I whip you. That
way's more fun."

"Hmm," I say. "That's 30 demerits. They're rather mounting up." I'm writing lots of Femdom porn at the moment, and desperate for a dose of the real thing. (It doesn't help that I'm still stuck with my chastity regime, and unable to masturbate after writing even the hottest scenes.)

"That's OK," says Xena brightly. "I like to wait until at least 60 before I whip you. That way's more fun."

The way she says it, not hamming it up, not being all porno-domme, makes me hard inside my Holy Trainer 2 chastity device.

I'm still hard as I kneel in the corner waiting for lights out, and later, lying next to her.

But in the morning I don't quite feel the visceral fear of the lash.

You see, on the one hand, I do flinch from the prospect of being hit. A few demerits genuinely makes me squirm.

On the other hand, I live for those moments where Xena really does step into her mistress role.

So now, being slapdash, leaving tasks undone... that's a way of bringing on another Femdom session. Worse, the question is now not How many lashes? but merely When?

That night I explain this to her as I rub her feet, not in terms of her spoiling my Femdom experience, but just how it undermines the system.

"I know. It's just this once," she says and goes back to her book.

I'm sure it wasn't just this once, but I don't argue. I don't need to be right, just enslaved...

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Don't resign yourself to just getting off on other people's adventures! When we started out, my wife was vanilla. Use my manuals to help you walk the same Femdom path! There's one for him, and one for her. 

Ask Giles: Why male chastity?

Why male chastity?

A friend asked:

What is the attraction for males to be chaste? I understand edging, not being allowed to come. I also understand having someone control when. But are you ever allowed to come? Or is the holding off the most exciting part? More than the release?

I've already written about the vanilla benefits of male chastity. In a nutshell:

• It gives us an extended plateau phase. Let's face, it a few seconds of squirting is a bit anticlimactic after all that build up, so this seems a fair trade - orgasm for sensuality.
• A lot of us feel a bit ambivalent over penetrative sex. This is partly cultural baggage, but also perhaps inherent in heterosexuality since 75% of women can't reach orgasm by penis alone; for most of us, penis in vagina comes as a reward, a gift or an afterthought. This can make us feel exposed and guilty. 
• Finally, female sexuality can be scary. The chastity device is a shark cage.

Now let's talk about submission, masochism and orientation.

...female sexuality can be scary.
 The chastity device is a shark cage.

Submission: Wearing a chastity device, surrendering control of your orgasm is about as submissive as you can get. The more submissive we are, the more we enjoy this surrender. It's an existential thing more than a sexual thing. I just feel right chaste.

Masochism: Masochism makes no sense until you realize that different modules in the brain work independently. I can be turned on by something I don't like, desire what I don't want and so on. Chastity where I don't get to come during erotic sessions is a pretty masochistic experience!  I'm trading orgasm for mind-blowing levels of turn on. The knowledge that I'm in extended chastity gives me a masochistic buzz every time I think about it.

Orientation: The brain is notoriously flexible and it seems that the male brain gets rewired by chastity until it becomes a sexual orientation. I feel sexiest in my device. All my fantasies revolve around being chaste, including my masturbation ones. When I feel horny, I just want to pleasure Xena. Of course the knowledge that my brain has been rewired, that I have been perverted, itself gives me a masochistic thrill...

So, am I allowed to come?Is the holding off the most exciting part? More than the release?

I generally come weekly. Our contract is set up so that Xena's orgasms delay mine. The more intense our erotic relationship, the less I get to masturbate. I would be very happy if Xena had several orgasm a week leaving me effectively permanently chaste. However, since we live in the real world with work and stress and so on, this doesn't happen very often.

I should add that different men like different aspects of chastity. For some it's extended foreplay and it usually, or always, comes off for sex.

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Don't resign yourself to just getting off on other people's adventures! When we started out, my wife was vanilla. Use my manuals to help you walk the same Femdom path! There's one for him, and one for her. 

Lady Fox of Custom Chastity gives me a nice review

Her shop is pretty much
 what I predicted about
the future of male
chastity devices.

Lady Fox of the new 3D printed Custom Chastity shop dropped by the Guest Book to leave a lovely review:

I have just down loaded your Getting Her to be a Vanilla Dominatrix.
LOVE LOVE LOVE - now all I have to do is point all the men that ask me how am I going to get my wife/partner into being a keyholder.
Will be adding a link on our site.
cheers
Lady Fox

Her shop is pretty much what I predicted about the future of male chastity devices, except they offer a range of material including steel and silver(!). I shall watch them with interest -- much as I love the HT2, the tube format is limiting in terms of endurance.

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Don't resign yourself to just getting off on other people's adventures! When we started out, my wife was vanilla. Use my manuals to help you walk the same Femdom path! There's one for him, and one for her. 

110 hours, 3 jogs, 3 showers and no problems in the Holy Trainer 2

...wrote and published a crazy
amount of chastity erotica.

OK perhaps I was premature in posting about how to really get dry after a shower in a Holy Trainer 2.

However, it worked!

Four days later I've just unlocked.

No marks on the shaft.

No skin problems.

No chafing.

In fact, sinisterly, the skin around my balls has never been healthier. I suppose the base ring keeps the scrotum from pressing into the thigh so the air circulates at night.

That was four days in which I jogged and showered three times (not counting right now), plus wrote and published a crazy amount of chastity erotica.

I'm left with the thought that, if it weren't for sports and relatives with children (who tend to climb on you) I could probably safely wear the device 24/7/365.

Something to "look forward to" when I'm older...

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Don't resign yourself to just getting off on other people's adventures! When we started out, my wife was vanilla. Use my manuals to help you walk the same Femdom path! There's one for him, and one for her.