"Go to your cell." |
"Yes, mistress," I say, and scurry off into the dressing room. It's small and full of shoes and coats - smells of leather and woman - but there's room for a sleeping mat. What started off as a backstop for when I snored has ended up as an option whenever Xena wants the bed to herself - like this weekday night. I turn off the light and lie down.
Service from an undemanding chattel slave suits her. |
I don't complain. I have my leather collar on, which means full stoic slave mode, no personality, no conversation. That also started as an occasional option. However, at the moment it's standard for the evenings - Xena has a big work project on, and doesn't have much social energy at the end of the day. Service from an undemanding chattel slave suits her.
Also, the fact she can do this to me turns me on horribly. I'm uncomfortably hard inside my Custom Chastity Saint, and have to arrange myself on my back.
Xena's light doesn't go off. There's a rummaging in drawers, then the buzz of a vibrator. Sated, she - apparently - falls asleep with the light on. I fall asleep eventually, and dream of Chastity Planet.
That was midweek.
(chaste dick pick behind the cut)
Frequent beatings! |
Yes, I'd rather lick her pussy, but I have no control whatsoever. I never really know what will happen. Nothing is negotiated, everything is the way Xena wants it, and right now - being a bit stressed - she's feeling withdrawn and bad tempered, and not in the mood for intimacy. In the morning she'll cuddle me, and we'll have morning coffee somewhere nice. By evening, it will be back to deliciously cold mistress-slave relations.
This is real submission and it feels great! There's no rush to cram in all the kinks while I can.
Our erotic peak experiences are probably no more frequent than for vanilla couples our age. Perhaps once or twice a month, Xena will be in the mood and there'll be whipping and mocking and nipple-clamping and licking. But unlike for many middle aged couples, we have a baseline that gives Xena mid week orgasms, and me daily kink and frequent beatings. I'm always chaste, she's always dominant, and often ready to wield the rod.
This has deepened even since when I last checked in a month ago. Xena has become utterly ruthless.
My wife seems to have finally internalised that her apparent bugs - dominant personality, tendency to coldness, strong sadistic streak, growing disinterest in penetration - are all features in our relationship, and that she can get just about anything she wants anyway, as long as it arrives through kink. So there are no more constraints. Xena gets her way, enjoys being selfish at times, expects obedience, uses the rod without compunction.
Careful what you wish for. |
(For those who've just tuned in, on her orders, nine months ago I replaced the magic locker with a polymorph plastic rivet. I can escape by carefully applying heat, but not casually. She can order my release, but not on whim or when in the sudden grip of qualms. The longer I stay sealed, the more permanent it feels to both of us. Release is not something we talk about.)
Yes, "permanent" chastity robs Xena of the leverage of keyholding and orgasm control. However, she's traded leverage for dominance. Somehow, my lack of a working erection makes her indisputably alpha. Since I'm indefinitely locked, she's indefinitely alpha. (This makes me wonder what effect a piercing would have - if pullout was practically as well as psychologically impossible.)
Clearly, then, permanent chastity is relationship dynamite for a couple like us.
However, it's only possible with the right device. I was right to be scared of the Custom Chastity Saint. There really are no practical reasons for removing it: no chafing, only rare turtling, no sore spots, no issues with cleaning, no hindrances in daily living, no problems with exercise.
As Xena said yesterday: Careful what you wish for.
Learn how to how to walk the same Femdom path with your partner!
Reading through your blog I am insanely jealous. Mind you this is coming from a single guy, who has only ever been continuously locked up for 1 week. So I could probably heed the advice of "be careful what you wish for". Never-the-less, I love reading through and hearing about Xena and your relationship. Hope I can be lucky enough one day!
ReplyDelete:) Not so much "careful what you wish for" as "ask for what you wish"!
DeleteReading your blog and updates has also had me considering buying my own custom chastity device. Just doing some research to find out which would work best for me. And I bought Chastity Planet and am enjoying it thoroughly so far!
ReplyDeleteP.S. sorry my comments are anonymous. I didn't want to link my only google acct that I use for everything.
Anonymity rocks! Glad you are enjoying my book. Do let me know where you'd like the sequel to go...
Delete