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| Guinevere was a Commander, Lancelot was a Champion. |
This of course is a minefield. My (unscientific) observation of real life kinky people is:
There's no correlation between kink preference and social or professional status, introvert/extrover or stereotypical kink behaviour. In real life most dominants don't strut, most subs don't cringe or flaunt their small dicks and so on.
However, I do see a correlation between D/s preference and what I think of as a Commander - Champion spectrum.
Just to illustrate the idea:
Champions are natural joiners, Commander's aren't.
Commanders lead decisively, Champions tend towards consensus building or else implementing/defending existing traditions or practices.
Commanders know what's good for you or an organisation, Champions are all about facilitating.
Commanders build empires, Champions run them.
Guinevere was a Commander, Lancelot was a Champion.
People at the Commander end of the spectrum can be very natural sexual dominants, but, because they like to be actually in charge, make lousy service tops. Just to muddy the waters, they may have an instinctive reluctance to buy into kink culture or pander to expectations. They may also be very adventurous bottoms, with no interest in doing all the hard work of topping.
People at the Champion end of the spectrum can be very natural sexual submissives, but also make great service tops if sufficiently motivated. An interest in topping may be a reaction to the fear of succumbing to a submissive undertow...
It's not simple because it's a spectrum, and because culture, upbringing and personal growth may mask natural type. It's also unhelpful that "bottoms" increasingly identify as "subs".
However, a good strategy would seem to be to look for Commanders and introduce them to kink that has some clear benefit for them. This may mean stepping out of your social comfort zone and approaching women a little different from the ones you naturally end up talking to, and perhaps tapping slightly different social skills
One of the big hazards of being a Champion is that you naturally feel more comfortable talking to other Champions and don't necessarily know how to have a conversation with a Commander.
Learn how to how to walk the same Femdom path with your partner!
CLICK HERE to download my Femdom Erotica (all written while chaste!)
However, I do see a correlation between D/s preference and what I think of as a Commander - Champion spectrum.
Just to illustrate the idea:
Champions are natural joiners, Commander's aren't.
Commanders lead decisively, Champions tend towards consensus building or else implementing/defending existing traditions or practices.
Commanders know what's good for you or an organisation, Champions are all about facilitating.
Commanders build empires, Champions run them.
Guinevere was a Commander, Lancelot was a Champion.
People at the Commander end of the spectrum can be very natural sexual dominants, but, because they like to be actually in charge, make lousy service tops. Just to muddy the waters, they may have an instinctive reluctance to buy into kink culture or pander to expectations. They may also be very adventurous bottoms, with no interest in doing all the hard work of topping.
People at the Champion end of the spectrum can be very natural sexual submissives, but also make great service tops if sufficiently motivated. An interest in topping may be a reaction to the fear of succumbing to a submissive undertow...
It's not simple because it's a spectrum, and because culture, upbringing and personal growth may mask natural type. It's also unhelpful that "bottoms" increasingly identify as "subs".
However, a good strategy would seem to be to look for Commanders and introduce them to kink that has some clear benefit for them. This may mean stepping out of your social comfort zone and approaching women a little different from the ones you naturally end up talking to, and perhaps tapping slightly different social skills
One of the big hazards of being a Champion is that you naturally feel more comfortable talking to other Champions and don't necessarily know how to have a conversation with a Commander.
Learn how to how to walk the same Femdom path with your partner!
CLICK HERE to download my Femdom Erotica (all written while chaste!)
(For ebook format,
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