Sabbatical in Slave Land Debrief 2 - Making a chastity marathon work

During our Femdom sabbatical I  "enjoyed" continuous chastity from Wednesday to Saturday, and Sunday to Friday. Not really a marathon by the standards of heroic chastity veterans like Richy or "Locked and Denied" (who has riveted his on!). Even so, this is much much more than my usual locked on Friday after work, free on Sunday morning before going for a run with friends.

Here's how it breaks down:

• 9 days of denial
• 9 nights in chastity (maximum 5 consecutive)
• approx 170 hours of chastity (maximum 115 consecutive)

So, denial, nights and hours... Here's what I learned.

Prepare realistically for your male chastity experience

Locking up in a chastity device is like going on a Mars mission - you need to 100% know that the technology will work during the journey. Read reviews and forums; it's not guaranteed. 

Ensure you have a device you can trust: All the little irritations and chafing - they add up.

The second device is the perfect fit. 

The first device I bought was... (blush)... too long - my penis head would get painfully lodged in the bend. God knows what days of this would have done to my sensitive tip! The second device is the perfect fit. I tested it with increasingly long lockups and even found a way to make make the chastity device 100% pullout-proof.

However I missed how the locking post would chafe my pubis - something I had to fix "in flight" using craft materials left over from my DIY CB days.

Know how to sleep in your device:  Not only can't you function without sleep, broken nights will put your partner off the whole adventure.!

A few sleepovers, and some forum searching, taught me to wear tight briefs to support my steel-cased gonads.

However, I forgot to avoid spicy food and coffee, and my first night in chastity entailed endless toilet trips. Later I made contingency plans to sleep in another room.

Be able to go out.

Set a sensible period: Each new record you set is virgin territory. Push yourself too far and you may find your device has become some kind of alien, intent on clawing your skin  to shreds.

I almost I did this. However, by the end of the final five day stretch, I had bad chafing. (A product called Sudocreme helped, but was hardly erotic!)

Be able to go out: During a long lockup, there's still shopping to do, cultural trips to make, a social life to maintain, and possibly work to go to.

This is why I shifted over to ball-gripping devices. I also thought through what I was prepared to do, and what would feel creepy.

Make your chastity marathon real

Use a non-human keyholder.

It's no fun being stuck in the halfway house between doing and not doing. The dominatrix becomes insecure or irritated, and starts second-guessing the sub. He, meanwhile focuses on the unlock/stay-in decision and becomes irritatingly restless. Better to make the chastity marathon as real as possible.

Use a non-human keyholder: Using Time lock self bondage software or the postal service takes the decision out of both your hands; there's no pressure on her, no temptation for the sub to wheedle. This certainly worked for us :)

Use the longest possible lock-in: The further away the next possible release date (as long as it is sensible!), the easier it is for both parties to accept the situation.
I discovered this when I hit the button to lock myself in for four days. Suddenly, I could sleep soundly.

Have realistic expectations of extended chastity

A male chastity device isn't "fire and forget", nor is it magic. Wearing it requires some adaption of behavior, and it won't magically change your relationship.

Keep yourself clean: If you chafe, the adventure will become an ordeal. If you start to stink, she may bring the adventure to an abrupt end.

I showered regularly, and used a hairdryer to remove all moisture, in both operations carefully tugging the skin through the base ring. (I was pleased this didn't defeat my security fix.)

You may be a walking horn, but most
of the time she is not going to be in
an erotic head space

Don't expect an erotic marathon: Though you may be aroused half the time, your device probably won't much change your partner's level of desire from what it would be in similar non-kinky circumstances. If you're enjoying an erotic week away, then that's what you'll get. If she's in her normal working routine, then expect sexual activity with the normal frequency, or slightly better.

Xena was working hard during our two weeks. Two erotic episodes was actually a slight improvement on what I would normally have expected. However, at first I felt cross and cheated.

Don't expect her to be interested in your experience very often: Again, asymmetry rears its head. You may be a walking horn, but most of the time she is not going to be in an erotic head space.

I did my best to shut up about my experience, but it was hard.

Don't plan a finale of wild sex once you are unlocked:  Sure, it seems like a great end to the experience - fuck like rabbits and use up all that trapped man-seed. There's two reasons why this might not work: first, though you've had a frustrating few days or weeks, she's probably had quite a satisfying one - she hasn't built up the same head of steam; second, an extended period of chastity may have left you chafed, sore, and bruised - your erection may not be impressive, and sex may be painful for you.

I timed my release for the afternoon after the last night of our Femdom sabbatical. I can't claim any special wisdom - I just wanted to extend the experience as long as possible. However, when I did unlock it was clear I was in no fit state for sex.

* * *

So lots of prep work, minimal partner engagement and no sex at the end - put like that extended chastity sounds pointless!

Actually, it was mind blowing.

The preparation  meant I could relax and enjoy the experience, Xena's matter of fact acceptance of my chastity was - frankly - deliciously terrifying, and being helplessly tossed on waves of desire, mind blowing.

All the days of denial amplified the effect if the last night, when Xena gave me a very thorough beating...

To enjoy a slice of this in your love life, try my Femdom self help books available in a variety of electronic-formats.