Short answer: "You can't!"
Long answer: "You can!"
The short answer - the one people yell - is, "you can't". This is because:
- Outside certain counter-cultures, sexually dominant women don't generally broadcast their preferences (because it can be inconvenient and because sex is private anyway).
- There's no certain link between kink and personality.
- Not all women who would enjoy Femdom have tried it or are even aware that the option might work for them.
People then go on to urge the poster to come to munches etc. Alas, not everybody wants to, or can, get involved in the Fetish scene.
However, the long answer is more positive but requires more work.
There is no guaranteed equivalent of gaydar (dommedar?). Even so, you can spot the women who, in the right circumstances, might potentially routinely enjoy dominating you.
If you are a sub, generally these are the women you are already going out with!
Seriously! Back in pre-scene, pre-Internet days, I had something like a 60% success rate at getting girlfriends to dominate me.
This works for two reasons:
First, as long as you are not dating in reaction to your kinks - e.g. picking out sweet submissive girls in order to reassure yourself of your masculinity - then there's a good chance that your instinctive choice is the right one. The links between kink and personality may be obscure, but they must exist on some level.
Second, most people enjoy being in charge and getting their way from time to time!
Rather than asking who to ask, you should be considering when and how to ask, and what for. The short answers are, "early", "honestly without making a fuss", and "extensions of vanilla activities she already enjoys".
Learn how to how to walk the same Femdom path with your partner!
CLICK HERE to download my Femdom Erotica (all written while chaste!)