Thursday, 12 June 2014

A typical work night in our Female Led Marriage

My wife looks up from her book.

"I wanted the front of the cooker cleaned, not just wiped down," says Xena conversationally. "You can give yourself another demerit."

 Not so long ago we couldn't mention kink
except in the bedroom and at exactly
the right moment. Now it's part of our lives.
My wife is sitting at the kitchen table eating her dinner and reading while I serve her food and tidy up around her.

This is not quite a FLR thing. I ate earlier because it's her yoga night and she's only just returned. I'm not in my male chastity device either because I'm about to go running with friends and I don't deliberately wear it socially.

I feel a little irritation then realize her assumption of command during vanilla time still surprises me. Not so long ago we couldn't mention kink except in the bedroom and at exactly the right moment. Now it's part of our lives.

It's about then that last beating echoes through my limbs and I feel a twinge of fear and arousal. "OK," I say. "How was your day?"

I'm not much different from a traditional
housewife looking after her breadwinner
We chat about her work, my chasing contracts, her yoga, and some local gossip. As I serve her desert, she says, "Tomorrow, can you vacuum the lounge and wash the downstairs windows?"

"Your wish is my command," I say with a hint of gallantry.

It's not quite protocol, but she takes my compliance so much for granted that I like to remind her that I've stopped arguing about housework because I'm her slave. I'm not a doormat -- honest! -- I'm a submissive.

I get the dishwasher going and head off for my run and a cup of tea with friends. Later I get home, shower, lock up my cock and get into my pajamas. Xena is glued to a US Crime drama so I bring her a cup of tea, finish off the kitchen then sit and rub her feet.

...what my Vanilla Dominatrix book
calls "Companion Mode".
Apart from my run, everything in the evening has been geared to supporting Xena.

I'm not much different from a traditional housewife looking after her breadwinner, though a fly on the wall would notice that Xena doesn't always say please and thank you.

We also chat and argue like any normal couple, though Xena always has the last word when she chooses. This is Xena in what my Vanilla Dominatrix book calls "Companion Mode".

Things change once we hit the bedroom.

Sometimes she... chats to me even as if
there was nothing odd about having her
husband on his knees awaiting her
I go and kneel in the corner, patient, silent, only speaking when spoken too. Sometimes she does speak to me, chats to me even as if there was nothing odd about having her husband on his knees awaiting her command. Mostly, though she changes for bed, has me put away her clothes, then reads or surfs while I wait.

Xena's lazy mode is Hermit. She recharges her batteries by switching off, getting cozy and losing herself in a book or iPad game. My natural chattiness becomes an irritation.

A month or so ago -- have we been doing FLR this long already? -- I wasn't just irritably chatty, I was also irritable. I felt I wasn't getting enough attention from Xena who was bringing work home most evenings, and I was also panicking about the work not coming in for me. That night, Xena matter-of-factly sent me to the corner.

I knelt there while she finished off some work emails and then while she read, totally ignoring me. I was torn between mounting agitation and annoyance, and a kind of awe at my own powerlessness. I did not want to be ignored, but I couldn't do anything about it.

At length she switched off the light, and still I knelt, now in the dark. I suspect this was supposed to be a test or prove a point, but she was so tired she simply fell asleep leaving me on my knees.

About half-an-hour later, she roused a little and murmured, "You may come to bed," and fell asleep again.

As I struggled to my feet, I replayed her words in my head. Not "Get off the floor, silly, why are you still playing at being a slave?" or "Come to bed honey and cuddle up". She still felt in charge even when she was barely awake. Better yet, she was still angry with me, but she was expressing that anger through our Femdom relationship. I was hard inside my chastity device as I slipped into bed next to my sleeping wife.

"What are you doing!?!... Back in the corner.
Give yourself a demerit."
The next night she did call me to bed and ordered me to go to sleep while she read late, but it felt awkward. "You could have left me kneeling," I said. "This feels all wrong."

"OK," she said. "Back on the floor."

So that's our protocol now. At bedtime I kneel in the corner emerging only to put away clothing and run errands. Eventually she summons me to massage her feet and legs, then I go back into the corner until lights out. (During the weekend there may also be oral sex, and on a good night some kinky love making and more playful Femdom.) Sometimes I look at the cozy bed and wish I were in it with her, realize I have no power in this situation, and get very hard indeed inside my Holy Trainer.

At first I thought she was just humoring me. However, the other day as she undressed I anticipated the next command and stood up to take her bra. Her eyes flashed. "What are you doing!?!" she said. "Back in the corner. Give yourself a demerit."

Kink aside, evening corner time is good for me, which is presumably why Xena started it. It forces me to stop revving, slow down and let go of the day's concerns. Kink-wise it's great. It plunges me straight into sub space, reminds me that we're doing this for real and that I have entered my own fantasies.

Xena also seems to like it. I suspect that it affirms her complete control over her surroundings and removes any guilty feeling that she ought to be interacting with me.

Finally, it's good for our Female Led Relationship. Even though the control is there, most of what we do during the working week looks normal and vanilla. Me kneeling in the corner, patient but ignored -- that's not normal. That's Femdom.

And that makes us both happy.

Don't just sit there staring at the screen feeling wistful! Take a look at my Femdom self-help books for couples where the female partner is vanilla!

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